hope
by no cure for crazy
Summary: All she can do is hold on to that small strand of hope.


AN: Because this fandom is in desperate need of more than just Clace. Just a short little thing that came to my mind that I'm just now getting down to writing. I guess it's just taken me this long to process everything about the mortal instruments coming to an end. I'm also trying to expand my writing more, so there's that.

Anyway, I just feel like this is something that could happen between these two after the events of city of heavenly fire. Plus, it's my first time writing for this fandom, so I hope I did okay with the characters.

Disclaimer: I'm obviously not Cassandra Clare because I don't have enough inspiration to constantly being writing books. But seriously though.

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Hope

Isabelle stands there, staring at him, neither of them speaking. There's an awkward silence hanging in the air. It never used to be like this for them. They could be silent around each other, but it used to be comfortable, never awkward.

For once, she isn't sure what she should say. She won't admit it, but it hurts knowing that he doesn't remember much. That he doesn't remember _them._

Most of all, she's shocked that he's really wanting to go through with this. That he's willingly to train and work to ascend. Of course, she's secretly glad if it means he can regain his memories – but she's also worried about how dangerous it may be in the future. If it gets that far.

Because he's _Simon _and she loves him even if she's never told him that and she worries.

She's selfishly glad that he wants to try, but at the same time she doesn't want him to feel like he has to do this.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" she asks him, breaking the awkward silence between the two.

He nods. "I wouldn't be here if I wasn't."

"Ascension is more dangerous than you think," she tells him, mentally kicking herself for trying to talk him out of it, but also wanting him, needing him to know all the risks.

She knows she's rambling but what else should she say? There are a million things she wants to say like finally tell him that she loves him, but now is not the time. There's a small part of her that's scared she'll never be able to.

"If you're not properly trained," he counters. "Alec's already told me all of that. And if I happen to get my memories back, it'll just help boost my chances."

_If you get the memories back,_ she tells herself. Because there's that small chance that he won't.

She hates feeling like this – hopeless. There's only one person who can help her through this and he doesn't even remember that he can.

"I'm already remembering some things," he adds after a while.

She nods, not wanting to give herself hope. It's progress, that's for sure. But she still doesn't want to give herself too much hope when there's a chance it will crash and burn later.

She glances around the room, her eyes on an old worn, tattered book underneath her bed. She finds herself walking towards the bed before bending over and picking up the book. Holding it in her hands, she realizes that it'sher copy of _The Shadowhunter's Codex._ It's worn and tattered and even stained from her accidently spilling perfume on it.

Slowly she turns around to face Simon again, still holding the book in her hand.

"You may try reading or skimming this," she says, handing the book to him. "Maybe it may spark something."

"It's your book, Isabelle," he responds.

"I've read it before, besides I don't need it at the moment," she tells him, simply. "I'm giving it to you to borrow for the time being. You may find it more useful than I do."

After a moment, he finally takes the book from her outstretched hands. He stares at it for a moment before glancing back up at her.

"Sometimes I find myself wondering what will happen if I don't remember everything," he eventually says.

_So do I, Simon. All the time._

"All we can do is just take it one day at a time," she says more for herself than for him.

That's all she can do, really. Just sit back, wait and hope something changes. She hates waiting but all she can do is hold on to that small strand of hope.


End file.
